The Truth about the Birds and the Bees (Part III)

This is going to be the last “heavy” post for a while. And this one is dedicated to Mr. Agedashi Dofu. Let us pray that he will get his internet access back soon so he can comment on this. Anyways, I would like to assert the definition of “shallow” that applies to men also applies to women. Feministas, feel free to send me hate mails. Women also have a blueprint that triggers their attraction mechanism, and when they see certain qualities dictated by the blueprint, they can’t help but feel attracted.


Evolutionarily, the REAL female’s attraction blueprint is not men’s good looks, rather it is: MONEY, POWER, and FAME(status). Men that display these will appear much more attractive to virtually all women. Again, there are exceptions to every rule, including this one. But ladies, if you insist that you are the exception and that you ABSOLUTELY don’t care about a man’s money-making potential in selecting a prospective mate, you might very well be right. But please consider that the good science of probability and statistics are working against you. There are too many present day examples to mention, of beautiful women marrying Mr. Money solely for his moolah alone. This is the reason (money, power, and fame) why almost all professional soccer players and other athletes always land supermodels. This also explains the current trend in which a lot of women in most Asian countries would confer an instant celebrity status to any average Joe “bule” or Caucasian males. There is a mistaken assumption that anything that is “bule” will guarantee provision of a great deal of money, power, and fame (status). Okay, maybe it does give status.

Let me graphically prove the validity of my assertion. Ladies, consider an investment banker from a top Wallstreet firm such as Goldman Sach, young and successful in his career, with an MBA from Harvard University, working a very very prestigious and coveted elite cream of the crop job while making more money than he has time to spend. Extremely impressive qualifications indeed. He oozes power, money, and fame (status). He can afford all the nice attires (expensive shirts, shoes, ties) that make him look much better than he really does. And you can bet that when you meet this guy, in your eyes he will look a lot better, a lot more intelligent, and a lot more confident than he really is. Such is the Halo effect.He can also afford to buy you most of any romantic gifts that you desire. Flowers? Romantic dinners overlooking the city at night? Shiny trinkets? After all, isn’t diamond the women’s best friend? He can afford to take you to romantic vacations anywhere in the world. Paris? Venice? He can also afford to give your sons and daughters a very good life, as well as the legacy to Harvard Business School (If you marry him your children will have a better chance of getting accepted to Harvard because their father is an alumnus). And most importantly, he will be able to afford the money to send your children there. All your neighbors and your friends during your college reunion will be very envious of you. Simply by being his mate, you can rub shoulders with the society’s elite and enjoy a very high and coveted status.

Now take a minute to imagine that you are going on a blind date with him tonight. But BEFORE meeting him and without assuming any prejudice that he is full of all the negative qualities you can think of, how many percent of the battle that he has already won? Fifty percent? Sixty? Be honest. And I still haven’t mentioned personality and character. Even the most idealistic and virtuous of all women will still feel growing attraction for this man based on his money, power, and fame (status) ALONE. Most women can’t help but feel instinctual attraction to men with these qualities. The same effect occurs if we substitute that guy with the son of a tycoon, with his father’s money, power and fame, managing multiple companies. Can you honestly say that all the things I mentioned about him do not count? If yes, then you are the exception. Okay, now back to reality and there’s probably no blind date tonight. But to a great majority of women, men with those qualities will trigger attraction in women the same way that a beautiful, sexy, supermodel triggers attraction in men.

Of course, having all the above qualities is by no means a guarantee that the guy above will win the war. Sure, he could have won 60% of the battle by having money, power, and fame alone, but he could lose 80% of it by lacking all the other positive human virtues. I am not I saying that the above-mentioned trinity of qualities are the ONLY qualities most women look for in a man (there are some women who only use this as the sole criteria). For most women, they are not. Neither is physical beauty the ONLY quality most men look for in women. But let’s admit that they do play a major role. Let’s not kid ourselves, we all love money, power and fame. Bottom line, any guys with these qualities can attract as many women as they like, anywhere in the world, building their steady supply of harem. But the good news is, just as men’s affinity towards beautiful women, women’s affinity towards these can also definitely be overcome by some other traits that men can develop. And I would even further argue that it is a LOT easier to overcome women’s affection towards money, power and fame than it is to overcome men’s affection towards physical beauty.

Moral of the story:
In the end, the issue is not to debate who is shallower between men and women or which one is the “holier” gender. Instead, we should all accept that both men and women have built-in tendencies to be attracted towards certain qualities. Both genders do not have the option not to be drawn to these, since this is already imprinted in us for thousands of years. It is only human to have these tendencies. And instead of pointing fingers (unless your fingers is pointed towards your nose for the purpose of harvesting) and fuel hatred between the two genders, it is a lot better to develop the qualities that we can develop in order to maximize all the potentials that we have. C’mon, we love each other.

Blazing Redfish